The circle of life has become strongly evident in the past 3 days and it is reminding me of how short life is. I have never been afraid of death. I actually look forward to it, in a excited, don't know what to expect, but it must be awesome, kind of way. Since I was a child, I've identified with angels and guardian angels. It gives me a sense of peace knowing I have these celestial beings looking out for me.
I have had this story in my head for the past six months, that I began writing down, but then stopped out of fear of manifesting something I am not ready to deal with yet, in real life. I realize as I am writing, that I am trying to convey how much I love my family. I want to have something tangible that all of them can see and hold in their hands. I want them to be proud of me. No, that isn't true, I know they are proud of me. I want them to know I am proud of them. That the little nuclear family of five I am a part of, makes me so happy. One of my favorite memories, growing up was when all five of us sat in the den and read parts of the Sunday paper together. Some mornings, all one heard was the turning of newspaper pages, or Dad sipping his coffee, or one of us rocking in the swivel chair. Other times, one would hear a discussion on articles we read, or a comic we laughed at, or what we planned on doing that day.
These past few days I have had co-workers and friends have parents pass, or their spouse suffer a stroke, or someone is in an accident and I am reminded that each day I wake up, is a miracle. I've been very emotional over how fortunate I have been in my life and I am very grateful. I always wonder how I got to this point. What happened in my life to get me to this moment in my life? What choices have I made to be the person I am today? It all begins with my family.
I will always be grateful to my Mom for teaching me to read, giving me a diary when I was 7 and teaching me to try everything. I will always be grateful to my Dad for making me laugh, introducing me to the joys of movies and television, and the importance of silence. I will always be grateful to my brother for his easiness with people, for always pushing me when I am about to quit and teaching me the truth of "if there is a will, there is a way". I am grateful to my sister for teaching me the importance of an open heart, the strength in showing your feelings and her loyalty to her family. I am very grateful to all of them for giving me the independence to travel the world and make my decisions and mistakes on my own. Every time I have travelled on my own, the first thing out of my mouth to someone, is a story of my family. They are always in my heart, even when it seems I am running away from them to go on my adventures.
My words are getting stuck and I am at a loss for words on what they mean to me and how proud I am of them. My family is what I always come back to, they are me and I am them. They are my angels, here on Earth, and I am so grateful!